By the Twitching of My Thumbs...

...Something Wicked This Way Comes. This perfectly describes my wicked washer and the devil in my dryer. I was so excited the day my new washer and dryer were delivered. I love having a new appliance or two (I actually have four new appliances, but who cares...). But my skills in the laundry department have devolved so quickly, I think I will need an "expert" to come scope out the laundry room.

The number of clothing and linen items destroyed under my direct supervision continues to grow. I am fighting a battle that cannot be won. Among the highlights of my recent washing defeats:

1. Washing and drying Scott's merino wool sweater (that he really liked to wear). Now it fits Roxy, but she said she did not ever want to wear itchy boy clothes.

2. A set of sheets, a wrinkle-free shirt, Roxy's Rock Star tshirt, some pajamas, and a pair of jeans that got washed with a tube of Cherry Coca Cola lip gloss. Permanent grease stains on all of these things.

3. A load of whites in which five items came out pink - and there was not a single red item in the entire load.

4. A pair of my jeans that I have had for three years that have never shrunk (until now.) And I'm not talking about the waist, I'm saying the legs shrank after 100+ washes.

All of these items have happened in the last four weeks. There must be a word for a fear of ruining laundry...