The Target Equation

We just got back from a trip to Target.  I went into the store, knowing that I needed some specific items.  Let me set this up like a formula:  put the things you know on one side of the equal sign, then solve for what you do not know on the other side (this is the variable.)

The things I know:

1.  I will need to buy multiple hair products for all of our multiple hairs.
2.  I will get sucked in to the book section, because for some reason the Target marketing team knows how to appeal to my Mom demographic.  (i.e. a picture of a woman/child from behind, standing on a sandy beach, with a subtitle about strength to move on after tragedy/perseverance in starting her life over/finding a long lost love/discovering a new purpose in life.)  You get the picture, right?
3.  Roxy will be bound and determined to spend all if not most of her allowance.  On mindless plastic crap.
4.  I will talk Roxy out of the plastic crap, then she will move on to the DS game section where she inevitably finds just what she wanted.  Sigh.
5.  Darby will have to visit the rest room.
6.  I will have to send Roxy with Darby so that Darby returns from the restroom, where they will find me reading book jackets in the book section of Target.
7.  Darby will get lost anyway, typically in the make-up section.
8.  Roxy will see someone she knows from school.
9.  I will see someone I know from church.
10.  There will be at least four items in the cart that I had no idea I was going to purchase.

This is the thing I don't know:

x=how much my grand total will be.  (There is no telling what it is when you are buying make-up, that's for sure.)
y=how much time we will waste in this store
So the equation looks like this:

((1+2+3)+(4+5+6)/(7+8+9))*10=x+y

Based on tonight's trip (and every other night's trip, in all honesty), the answer for x is always around $80, including the DS game purchased by Roxy.

As far as y goes, it's usually about an hour.  But I do love this hour with my girls, in my quiet and not-at-all creepy Target.