Life Lessons

I have become somewhat fixated with trying to teach some life lessons to my daughters.  There are so many things that you learn, mostly from bad experiences, and I would like for them to hurry up and learn all this stuff.  I am focusing on these lessons right now:

1.  Pick up all of your debris BEFORE Daddy comes home.  I don't know how many times they want to irritate their father, but my single shot warning method is not working (tell them Daddy will be home soon - is the house a mess?) and I refuse to issue more than one warning because that would put me in the same catergory as the nagging woman in Proverbs (the one who makes the man want to sit on the roof of his house just to get away from her.)

2.  Moisturize, moisturize, moisturize.  In Janurary and February, you must rub lotion on your hands at least two times a day, if not more.  My daughters are currently studying/sleeping with sticky Vaseline hands, trying to heal their cracked skin.  Ouch.

3.  Put your homework in your book bag right after you finish it.  Enough said.

4.  Do not wash your hair five minutes before it is time to go to church.  My husband is completely confused by this lesson, but he has never been resposible for taking a girl with a ten pound afro, dripping wet, to church on Sunday morning.  I need not mention the need for combing out the 'fro, because if you have seen the girl, you would know that combing is at least 20 minutes of pain, drama, and nappiness.

5.  Communicate.  Your needs, your wants, your everything.  Don't blame me for not having extra sensory perception.  I am the MOST perceptive person in this house and I use my mom super powers often, but unspoken needs are usually unmet needs.

6.  Get dressed in less than five minutes.  Making others wait on you is a sign of narcissism.  Don't fall into that category in this house.

7.  Wear winter clothes in the winter.  You have warm boots and warm clothes for a good reason.

8.  Don't leave your swimsuit and towel wadded up under your bed or in the bottom of the workout bag.  That is just plain nasty.

9.  Spit out your toothpaste directly over the drain in the sink.  I'm tired of looking at your spit and no one wants to clean up after you anyway.

10.  It is a pleasure to raise you, my beloved daughters.  The treasured moments are the simple ones that you least expect to have the most meaning.  No matter what happens, remember that I give you a hug and a kiss every morning when you head out on your day.  I will try to have some fresh baked cookies ready for you when you come home (at least a couple times a month.)